What you need to know about hewlett packard.

[Drake]

Check this out.

A former Hewlett-Packard worker could barely wait for their non-disclosure-agreement to end so they could spill 14 company secrets to The Consumerist.

1: Many HP Printers, like their laser printers, have a built-in page-count after which they won't work. This resides in the a transpart sometimes called image or drum kit. Rather than get the printer fixed, it's often cheaper to buy a new printer, OR you can do a NV ram reset. It resets everything in the printer, including all the page counts, but it's not without risks.

2: To get past the voice prompt system, repeatedly say "Agent." It will take two or three repetitions, but it will get you to a human.

3: If a set of cartridges cost more than the printer, don't buy the printer. It's considered a "throwaway" printer. HP service techs are told to spend no more than 30 minutes working on these because at that point, you are costing HP money.


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4: HP cartridges have a warranty separate from their printer. The printer might be out of warranty, but the cartridges might not be. Cartridge goes plooey, call in.

5: Any HP printer that has been on the market for 6 months has its tech support outsourced. This means you might wind up talking to India, Canada or Costa Rica. Of the three, Canada at least speaks a variant of American.

6: If you have been told that you will receive a part by a certain date, follow up immediately. HP Parts Store was recently moved to Central America. HP Parts Store isn't talking to HP Tech Support because the Tech Support CSR can see what is in the HP PS inventory and knows when they're bullshitting. Every other part of HP hates HP Parts Store because of lost inventory, improper procedures, missed shipments, etc.

7: Using non-HP cartridges in your printer will void your warranty, and sometimes makes stuff blow up real good. The tech support will hang up on you if it is proven that the damage was caused by non-HP cartridges.

8: Just because the sales people say that your HP printer can use 120lbs paper doesn't mean it actually can. You want the straight dope on a printer? Call up HP tech support or check the website.

9: If your printer is just out of warranty and you have a problem with it, call tech support anyway. You will first likely be directed to a "warranty agent." Tell them firmly that you have an "extended warranty" and they will forward you on to tech support under "customer claims warranty." The Tech Agent MUST give you support as per HP policy.

10: Don't yell at the Tech Support CSRs. Most of them make just over minimum wage and just want to get the call over. If you have a problem, firmly request a supervisor.

11: If you threaten a lawsuit, HP CSRs are told to stop the call immediately and hang up.

12: Many HP CSRs are cross-trained into other departments. It doesn't hurt to ask if they know about the product or problem if you get misrouted.

13. HP's Beta Software website is at: http://www.hp.com/pond/ljbeta/. Only beta because it hasn't been put on the distribution cds yet. A lot of drivers here will do stuff that the installation cds won't. Also has fixes. HP maintains similar unadvertised websites throughout their system...

14. http://www.hp.com/pond/pnp Point and print = a new hp toy.

[brian.austin]

I quit using HP printers when their stupid software started taking over my systems. If I have to use one, I use the bare minimum driver. They could never explain why there had to be 6 flippin' processes to make a color print on a HP620CSe.

Now I'm having major issues with one of their storage servers at my office. Enough where I'm losing drives almost as fast as I can replace them. No more HP whatever for me PERIOD. I've had it.

[Jwilmot]

I used to work in there R&D department back in Lynwood Washington, the employees try there best but corporate hamstrings even there engineers. Its like any big company they want profits with as little cost as possible. My job back in the early 90's was to build the machines the engineers designed, then test the crap out of them to find anything that would break. Unfortunately when I found something that was not completely debilitating the corporate guys would not let the engineers redesign it. If it would not break over X period of time they made them leave it to save time and money.
Things got even worse when HP and Compaq merged. As a computer/network tech for over 6 years I stopped recommending both brands before XP came out.

Johnathan

[usnrs]

i didn't know all this tech stuff, alls i know is i hate (really really hate) my hp printer, i'm on my third one (best buy let me trade the first two in) and i'm zero for three for getting a decent printer - it scans well enough, but i'll get dressed and drive to the university to print anything - mine's that bad.

[jfrancho]

And this is any different from just about every other manufacturer how?

[happusa]

Get an Epson!

[Jules]

Use a pencil.

[atomic]

I bought an HP laptop six months ago and the hard disc light blinks continuously. I have emailed, chatted and talked to HP idiots and their supervisors and no one can understand that I have a problem with my machine. Every one of them tries to tell me that the hard disc is working in the background. Oh BS. I have been using computers for almost 30 years. I know a defective hard disc light when I see one. I even sent it back to HP for repair. They ran tests and said nothing is wrong with it. How can these people make and sell computers and not understand a basic problem I have. Of course they would have to replace the motherboard to fix it so it will never happen.

I also bought an HP printer about the same time. The price of ink was so outrageous I ended up donating the computer to Goodwill just to get rid of it. I bought a $25 cartridge and printed 10 8x10s and the $25 cartridge was out of ink. There is also a $20 cartridge and it was severly depleted. Counting the cost of ink, paper and the printer I figure an 8x10 was costing me at least $5 a print. I tried to sell it on eBay but no one bid.

I have learned my lesson. I will never ever even think about an HP product.