Originally Posted by Ed Shapiro
This is an old and frustrating story. Again, I am not trying to brag but I have clocked in 51 years in the wedding photography business so let me help simplify things and put an end to all of the frustrations. I and my staff, over the years, have taken many approaches to solve theses problems so here are the ideas that worked and parties concerned; we- the photographers, the clients and the clergy.
Logic is one of favorite things, so before I become angry, fly off the handle or give myself and everyone else around me a nervous breakdown, I try to apply logic and common sense and figure out savvy and diplomatic ways of solving any problems that may arise- this usually works. So here are some of the logical components that go into solving the problem at hand.
· Since most wedding photography does not take place in our studios, it is important to realize that houses of worship and reception venues are our work places. You do not want to do anything to make you unwelcome in places where you earn your living. The best thing to do in order to preserve and maintain good relations with churches, synagogues, all manner of sacred places and hospitality venues, is to show respect, kindness, and willingness to cooperate with all the PEOPLE who dwell within those places. Yes! As Dave pointed out, they are people too.
· If there are rules which seem draconian or unfair or even of they there are none, I make it my business to see all of the clergy in charge of the various religious institutions, all the caterers, hall-keepers, hotel people and wedding planners that I will probably run into in our service area. If there are problems, I try to explain our business and operational ethics as photographers working at events at their venues. I always keep in mind that I will get more cooperation with honey as opposed to vinegar and approach everyone with a spirit of friendliness and cooperation. I find that when I extend my hand in friendship most people will react accordingly- what are they gonna do- throw me out? That has never happened.
· The succinct points I want to get across in all theses meeting is that we do not come into venues with the intention of being disruptive or intrusive. I explain that we are not totally invisible but do everything we can to maintain a low profile and will not jump alter rails or stand between the couple and the clergyperson or official who is conducting the ceremonies. We also assure the clergy that we are not in the business of using Holy Sacraments or sacred ceremonies to gain profit. I inform them that we charge our clients the same rates even if we never enter the church. Our only goal, in terms of the ceremony, is to capture all the religious aspects of the wedding for clients who desire to have such images in their wedding albums and without theses images, some feel the photographs reflect nothing more than a big party. I have secured so much cooperation with this explanation that it oftentimes amazes me.
· Many clergypersons confided that if only the photographers would just ask permission and familiarize themselves with their rules and feelings on the matter, they- the Clergy, would be more accommodating.
· With reception folks- I assure them that they can expect total cooperation from us and explain some of the cooperation that we will need when working at the venues. It is important that we don’t get in the way of their serving staff when they are at their busiest and take every safety precaution as to the placement of our equipment. Over the years I can say that we get the utmost cooperation from all the food service and hospitality people that we have worked with.
· Listen up good photographers- Having altercations, feuds or doing battle with religious institutions has got to be the worst kind of public relations or public image you can garner short of being an axe murderer. DON’T DO DAT!
· In a perfect world, the aforementioned policies will work all the time, but it ain’t a perfect world that we live in. You will run into people in authority who are intransigent and even downright nasty and who will refuse to even see you- so what do you do? The first thing I do, when I find out that I am severely limited as to the ceremony coverage, is to talk to the wedding couple and find out their take on the matter. Surprisingly enough, nowadays many couples are not all that interested in the ceremony and tell me that the only reason they are having a religious wedding as opposed to a civil one, is out of respect for their parents and a few shots from the back of the church would suffice. Why get into a tizzy about that? Just stick to the rules and forget about it. If the couple wants to go off on a tirade with their church people- that is their business- it is up to them to acquire some kind of dispensation or permission! If they ask you to break the rules, DON”T! They may never go back to that venue again but you have to work there- perhaps time and time again.
· Business is business! I employ many of the policies and stipulations in my wedding contracts as I do in my commercial contracts. I state that the specified prices and charges pertain ONLY the photographic services and products that are specified in the contract. Other charges such as special packaging, shipping travel out of our service area, special insurance wavers, fees/licensees/ permits charge by local, provincial, federal or private companies in order to access gardens, parks or other properties are to be paid for by the client. We will either collect theses fees in advance or charge the clients back for them.
· Another approach is to raise your prices to accommodate such things as disproportionate insurance requirements from catering establishments. Those additional premiums are valid overhead operational costs and heave to be represented in your fees just like your rent, telephone and other expenses. Theses venues should have adequate public liability insurance of their own. I can’t see a photographer needing more than 2 million dollars worth. If the couple signed a “wedding contract” with their church, they are the ones who may have sabotaged your efforts and the will simply have to live with the limitations the have imposed on you. You should not be expected to fight with churches.
· Different couples and families have different priorities- some may place photography high up on the list and others may consider it a necessary evil and/or everything and anything in between. If couples want lots of photography at their ceremonies the need to find a venue which allows for that. If they prioritize their relationship with their church or synagogue then you are second fiddle and you just do the best that you can under the circumstances you are given to work with. I tend not to book weddings where I am too low on the priority list- I can live with a bit of difficulty but I don’t go the weddings too pull teeth for every shot and spar with the church folks.
· Last resort! Thankfully, I have seen only a few cases where church or hall officials have exhibited totally outrageous behavior with me or my staff. Shamefully enough, there were a few that were totally hostile, confrontational, obnoxious and purposely uncooperative. All we did was refuse any and all work at these places- total boycott! We came to realize that workin at theses places were not profitable in the long run because having ourselves subject to the embarrassment in front of our clients and their guests could be seriously detrimental to our reputation. There were occasions where we were asked, on the spot, for kickbacks in a threatening manner. There were incidents where I had to threaten a person with violence if he continued to harass me in the middle of a reception. That got rid of him but there is always the danger of coming off as the bad guy in front of a church or hall full of people.
· Happily enough, the boycotting system worked after a time because other photographers and vendors began to do the same and eventually things changed.
Let me explain “outrageous”! There was a church in town that was run with the same warmth, hospitality and finesse as a military prison. They were especially hostile toward photographers. The clergyman there would get in my face- latterly get in my face and demanded knowing if I knew the rules, I would answer respectfully that I did indeed understand the rules and that I intended to stay within them. He would usually reply something like “I don’t like the way you said that” or something just as inane. Perhaps he detected the veins protruding from my forehead or the red in my eyes so he would walk away but he just HAD to lay some intimidation on every photographer.
One fine Saturday, I was working in that church with a great video crew. Theses were the nicest guys you could work with and their results were superb. They worked a two camera job with high grade broadcast quality ENG cameras (state of the art in those days) and they worked hard and inconspicuously. One of the guys took up a position so he could record the procession. With that, our favorite clergyman came down the aisle like a taxi with both doors open a purposely knocked the videographer off his feet sending the camera to the hard marble floor and cutting the poor guys cheek as it flew forward- all of this happening during the actual procession and ceremony. The injured videographer stood up, recovered his damaged camera, put is hand to his bleeding cheek and quickly left the church. The second cameraman stepped in immediately and continued taping.
There was a point in the service where everyone was engaged in quiet prayer when the sound of multiple emergency vehicles were heard. One police courser with flashing dome lights and sirens pulled up in front of the church and double parked alongside the limos. Another curser came to the side of the church and then came the paramedics with the large screaming ambulance. Seems they were responding to the 911 cell phone call from the videographer who said he had been assaulted, his property destroyed and he had been injured and that furthermore the perpetrator of all theses dastardly deeds was still on the scene in the church.
When the 4 policemen entered the church, wearing flack vests, hands on their gun grips and walkie-talkies blearing- they soon cooled their jets when the saw the ceremony in progress but cautiously walked toward the front of the church. Talk about distractions! I continued shooting as did the remaining videographer. There main part of the ceremony was over and the wedding party and the clergyman retired to the sacristy to sign the marriage certificates where one rather burly policeman was allready waiting. After the recessional, we proceeded to the reception but there was even more activity going on outside the church. Another wedding party was pulling in along with two unmarked detective units that were called in to investigate the assault.
The police charged the good reverend with a number of charges including assault causing bodily harm and were about to give him a desk appearance ticket allowing him to remain free but with the proviso that he would have to come into the police station the first thing Monday morning or risk arrest. The videographer was livid and insisted that the police take him into custody right on the spot. He remarked that tickets were for littering and folks who allow their dogs to poop on the sidewalk, not for those who cause bodily harm. So the good reverend was placed in handcuffs, read his rights and dragged off the police station. Meanwhile the detectives were questioning some of the guests as to what actually happened and this delayed the reception by 2 hours- the caterers was livid. The videographer was taken to the ER and given 14 stitches and was held overnight for observation to make sure he did not sustain serious neurological injuries.
What as mess! What a disservice to the wedding couple and their families. It got into the newspapers! There were criminal charges and private lawsuits by the video guys and the bride’s family. Many thousands of dollars later it all got settled quietly. In 51 years that is the first and last incident of that magnitude that I have ever seen go down at a wedding involving a photographer. After this incident things changed, new clergy were appointed and I go there all the time as a welcome guest.
Under normal circumstances, the quiet diplomatic way is always best. You have to come out as being the good guy or good gall and keep you reputation a patient and caring professional.
Ed
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